Friday, July 7, 2006 | Where's Kenny? I AM thoroughly enjoying the growing cloud of ambiguity dangling over the purported death of Kenny Lay. Perhaps the bigger question than "Is he dead?" is, "Was he ever alive, or was he a vampire all along?" But let's stick to the "conspiracy" theories. I find it deeply reassuring that people are questioning this one, right around the whole lunatic fringe from left to right, inward toward the core covering every shade of center. Personally, I don't care that much if Kenny is still on the planet or not, but I do hope to interview him soon. What I find enormously gratifying is that a lot of people seem to be shaking their heads in doubt. It's good practice to have that feeling. To just not be able to take a news story, whatever the fuck it is, at face value. To have got past that point where you cannot accept what these idiots put out without chewing it for a second or longer. So, is Kenny deep sixed, or is he drinking a martini in the Italian Alps? It's a fun question, isn't it. But let it seduce you with its mystery, till you finally lust for the truth -- about anything. PS, I forgot to predict this -- but "Kenny" will indeed be cremated. PPS, Ursula Fugger, one of my favorite astrologer/news junkies (serious case) absolutely says he's dead. But this is the important part -- total ambiguity. If she says his chart says this is not a fake, she's probably right. Heck, she usually is! If I say the horary says he was whisked off in the bin Laden private jet, I'm probably right; I have a decent batting average. Keep the fog machine cranking. All theories welcome, including those involving ETs, the Stargate, etc. PPS, They killed Kenny! Those bastards.